Wednesday, July 28, 2021

Guest Post: The Narrative armies of Gerbil Papa

 Hey Everyone!  Today I have a guest post from a Gerbil Papa.  We have connected over on Instagram over Warhammer as well as Fitness!  Below you will find his various army lore and pictures of models from those very armies!  Be sure to check him out and give him a follow on Instagram and enjoy the lore!



Stay Stormcast Strong and Happy Hobbying!


1) The Jade Talons - Seraphon aligned Stormcast. 


The Anvil of Apotheosis takes as much as it gives, on the one hand it presents life from the jaws of death on the other it can take what made that life worth living. It can take memories, names, even feelings. The Jade Talons are a unique even amongst the distinguished Stormhosts in multiple ways. As the brave warriors of the Hallowed Knights fell to the hordes of Chaos in the war for the Jade Kingdom some of them found themselves again upon the Anvil of Apotheosis. Some of them fell again even after this, only to be reforged yet again. However, many do not pass such repeated reforging, and those who do are certainly not unharmed. The Jade Talons were formed from those who have fallen and risen more times than they can remember, which is not surprising given they remember very little. Too emotionless and harbouring a deep lust for revenge against Chaos they were removed from even the Hallowed Knights and formed into their own chamber. They are the living symbols of Sigmars continued failure and as a result of such are not known to most, even amongst other stormcasts.





Removed from humanity, both in terms of physical proximity and the state of their battered souls the Jade Talons have found unusual allies with the Seraphon. Even the Saurus admire their stoic nature and hatred for Chaos. As a result of such their new skink allies plated their sigmarite armour in gold so and forged them masks of jade so that they might remember what little they can of their homeland, these vestments were blessed by the skink priests themselves. The Seraphon have even been known to allow elite strike forces to board temple ships for quick deployment to battle. Bonds between Saurus are rare, even more so are bonds between Saurus and humans yet so close are these allies that should a Saurus fall in battle their comrades bring their corpse to the Jade Talons so that their hide might further protect them. In return the stormcast offer the helmets of their fallen comrades to their allies as a memento of both Sigmar's and humanities dedication to the eradication of Chaos.


However, their stoicism has blackened their reputation. Villages put to the blade for a single mention of Nurgle. The death of allies and civillians has lost all meaning. Relations between the stormhost and their peers is soured, and their attempts to liase with non-stormcast often ends in disaster and offense. As a result of such one tenth of all commanders are required to undergo questioning on their reforging, even the slightest memory can be a quick path through the ranks due to the immense need for liason officers. 


Despite their mobility aboard the Seraphon ships the Jade Talons have found a home in an abandoned monastary that laws crumbling above a cliff edge. Each morning skinks scale the cliffs, returning at the end of the day with nets full of fish for food and shells to make ritual adornments. The monuments to Sigmar and Dracothion have been added to with Seraphon offerings and crude altars. This purposeful seclusion allows both Stormcast and Seraphon to hunt in the wild, whilst keeping Sigmarite populations safe from both foe, and the Jade Talon's infamous misjudgements. 


Reinforcements, typically, are a cause for celebration within most Stormhosts, but for the Jade Talons it was almost a funerary affair. To be so lifeless, so inhumane, so alien, that you were sent to the Jade Talons meant that your original Stormhost would be told that your soul had perished on the anvil. Only Stormcast Lords from other Stormhosts were trusted enough to know of the fate that could await any Stormcast. Whilst mutterings of the flaws of reforgings were common, few had seen it taken to it's most daunting extent. Thus, Penumbral engines and the Jade Talons go hand in hand, and should survivors remain only distant memories of jade masks and scaled hides remain in their dreams. 


The curse of the black skies weighed heavy upon the Jade Talons. To die in the line of battle was nearly normalised, and the idea of not coming back was met with mixed responses. Secretly, many of those with a glimmer of their original personalities hoped to die whilst they still remembered anything at all. Others feared the logistical efforts that would come from this, cutting off both their new reinforcements and ability to replenish casualties. When word came of the Thunderstrike armour, the process of reinforcing the Jade Talons began immediately, though due to their wide spread accross the realms, and the objections by their Skink squires, it is happening increasingly slowly. Thus a force known for near suicidal fast strike missions has forced themselves to rely on smaller, elite forces (often compromised of those fresh off the anvil), whilst the bulk of them only commit when is necessary. Those still with emotions find themselves lashing out with rage at new recruits, such as the Vindictors, out of rage of being useless. To be made for war, lose all of your ability to do otherwise, and then not be able to fight tears them apart. 


2) Karlus Fantzangelus' Divine Crused - A Cities of Sigmar travelling band. 


Karlus Fantzangelus was shamefully, and secretly, exiled from his families estates in Azyr for "disreputable actions" (a kind term for deeds that would impress an ardent Slaaneshi cultist). In repentance he vowed to search out the great Godbeast Cindrox which had destroyed many of his families trade routes in Aqshy. 




Firstly he recruited a great mage,  a master of the arcane arts, and through bribes and a convincing speech (but mainly the bribes) aquired rental of a celestial hurricanum for his first ally. The issue however, is that the mage in question (The Marvelous Mervin) was a children's entertainer whom Karlus saw pull a rabbit out of a hat and assumed he was a wise amber mage. ~

Then, the search began, exiting Azyr with a retinue of his household guard (partly to keep him safe, partly to save face and make it seem less like an exile). In Anvilgard a crew of scourge corsairs were hired; led by Captain Tim'o'thee of Burt-upon-hone. This stalwart crew contains genuine beast tamers, bonafide charioteers (lead by Wynonna the Rider), and flawless musicians (including the great Danny the Elfman). Despite these credentials however, the crew has realised the vast wealth that can be gathered by claiming their daily wage, each day telling their benefactor that "the beast is merely a days ride away my leige" or that a particular tavern must be investigated most thoroughly for clues. For months and months a menagerie of elven pirates, haughty gryph-bound nobles, and increasingly annoyed dispossed engineers have trudged around Aqshy heading firmly in the opposite direction. Though come the fall of Anvilgard, increasingly revenge for their beloved home has come upon the minds of the band and the future of the expedition depends upon a narrow equation betwixt coin and pride. 


3) Kruleboyz - Brettoni Orks. 


Around a dingy fire in the middle of the camp three hulking figures poked idly at the embers.

"Sum sez e'z from Ghur, cuz e'z proppa gud at smashing" said one admiring his pointy-est sticka.

"Nah, see, E'z from Ulgu cuz e'z sneaky n cunnin". The third figure piped up "you'ze got it backwards, E'z from Hysh cuz of ow shiny dat armour iz, n, ow white E iz".

More and more kruleboyz had gathered around now, realising it was their second favourite topic of conversation (shortly after what's the best way to cause horrific agony to unlucky gits).

A voice harsh and gutteral, even for kruleboyz piped up "nah nah nah, Chamon I rekon, look at ow flash iz gear iz". The orruk's looked up at this exceptionally brave hobgrot and the nearest greenskin gave him a wallop. The argument increased with guesses ranging from realm to realm, steadily growing louder and with more and more fights breaking out.


Then a roar sounded behind them; and a great grey gnashtooth trotted up to the fire. Mounted upon the beast was an impressive Orruk draped in red and blue cloth. His pale white face contorted into a snarl and he bellowed "LISTEN YOU LAZY GITZ, DONT YOU WORRY ABOUT WHERE IM FROM, WORRY ABOUT WHAT I'LL DO TO YA IF YOUZE DONT FIGHT PROPPA GOOD. WE IZ DA KNIGHTS OF MORK AND WE'Z GOT A REPUTATION TO UPHOLD". Some of the smaller orruks cowerd, whilst others found themselves whipped up into a frenzy at the sight of Da Big Pale One. The killaboss grabbed at his robes "REMEMBER WHEN WE GOT SMASHED BY DA FANCY TIN BOYZ?", this lead to painful grumblings and cries of anger. The chivalric order sent to wipe this kruleboy infestation out had nearly succeded. "WELL WHO IZ LAUGHING NOW?, WE WILL BE 'ITTIN DERE 'OME TOMORRA NIGHT. BUT DIS TIME, WE IZ AZ SHINY, WE IZ AZ COLOURFUL, WE AZ GOT EVERYFINK DEY DO AND MORE! CUZ WE GOT MORK!" The Greenskin horde roared now, beating their chests with their open blades, clanging their shields against their helmets, and swinging the nearest grot's around their heads.